Christmas is associated with giving or showing love. We all long to show love by giving a gift to our loved ones.
We like to give our children a treat of their lifetime by buying for them new clothes, new toys, new computer games etc.
We love giving our loved ones (Husband, wife, girlfriend or boyfriend) a surprise that they will live to remember.
You have spent the last six months window shopping for that designer perfume for her, that high heeled shoe she admires all the time, that shaving machine he saw while on holiday, that touch screen mobile phone etc.
These things are nice and we all like them.
However, it is possible to give precious things which have no monetary value. There are things that we normally overlook and can make our loved ones happier than giving them an expensive cologne or expensive dress. The things that I write about cost us nothing but we underestimate or completely fail to see their impact.
We need to change our thinking about giving and go back to basics. We need to learn to give things that cost us nothing but have great impact in our lives and the lives of our loved ones. We need to give something that makes them feel great about themselves. We need to give them something that makes our loved ones to feel loved and appreciated the way they are.
These are the 7 free ways to show memorable love and appreciation this Christmas
1. Allow your spouse to do what he/she loves.
I know wives have clear way they want their husbands to dress (probably in a suit and a tie) and behave (may be no drinking) during this festive season. Some have gone further and scribbled down in their minds ten things he should not do this Christmas or else they part ways.
On the other hand the husbands do not want to see their wives in the company of so and so or a husband does not want to see his wife dressed in a mini although she feels confident in one.
Give her a break; allow her to be what she loves. Do not make any comment; just watch her express herself fully. This is free love.
If you are a man do not draw unfounded conclusion when your girlfriend decides to visit a old college mate. Do not even try to find out what they did while together. Allow her to be who she is and do what she loves. This is a true way of showing love.
2. Allow your kids to visit who they love.
I know you have a discreet plan of who you will visit this festive season. These is very good and enjoy your time together. In addition, your daughter or son longs to visit a friend but you feel they shouldn’t. Please show love by allowing them to make a choice of who to visit and facilitate all their efforts to see their loved friend. If they want money for a gift and transport, please give them.
If some of their friends who want to come and visit, allow them and again make sure you are there to help in preparations and cooking. This is the true way of showing love.
3. Limit blaming and complaining.
You may not be aware of this, but whenever you meet with your friends you start by complaining about this or that, it could be the government, about your parents, about your boss or even about the same friends.
This complaining drives some people crazy, but since they love you, they refrain from telling you or else it will ruin your relationships. Some even go to an extent of avoiding you because they know what you will say next.
This Christmas season, gives your wrongdoer a break. Limit or completely avoid complaining. This will create peace and love within you and your loved ones.
4. Allow your kids to be who they are.
Kids are amazing. They always do exactly opposite of what their parents want. Some parents feel intimidated and therefore result in punishing them or shouting at them.
For once this year, allow your kids to be who they are. For at least one week, give them a leeway to exercise their freedom. Let them keep their hair unkempt until they see sense of having it nicely combed. Let them soil their clothes until they see sense of keeping them clean. This is a free gift for them and they will remember this one week of freedom for many years to come.
5. Kids give your parents peace of mind this festive season
It is good for kids to get a gift during Christmas. However, some parents cannot afford, and it is true they can’t afford.
Instead, these parents are weighed down by the burden of the school fees they will pay in January.
It is such a time that kids should understand and avoid demanding for gifts. This will give their parents peace of mind. On the other hand, parents will view kids as loving and appreciative. When the parents will get money, they will for sure remember and buy you a gift.
6. Compliment
Can you remember the last time you told your boss he is kind and loving? or told your parents thank you for their love?
Take time and compliment your spouse for keeping the marriage together throughout the year. There were enough reasons (founded or unfounded) to say enough is enough.
Take time to thank your children for making your life busy. There are many would wish to have a kid but they cannot.
Take time and tell God thank you that you are alive.
Take time and thank …………you know who to thank. This will create a sense of gratitude and happiness in you and in the other person.
A person might live to remember your sincere gratitude than an expensive gift.
7. Forgiveness
All the above 6 things, are ways of giving or showing love to another person. However, forgiveness has nothing tangible to show. But it will create profound relieve in your heart and mind. (No wonder many argue cancers are caused by holding resentment and grudges).
Forgive the guy that dumped you.
Forgive that person who owes you money and he does not want to pay.
Forgive your spouse if he/she wronged you.
Forgive your colleagues at work for falsely reporting to the supervisor.
Forgive those who maligned your name in 2009.
Forgive those who accused you falsely.
Forgive the one who lied to you.
Forgive the government for letting its people down.
Forgive your kids for being disobedient.
Forgive your boss for not showing emotions when you were sick and needed sick leave.
Forgive your husband who did not help with house chores.
Forgive your wife who never minds about your feelings and emotions.
Forgive your……….
Forgiveness will make your life come alive again. You will become yourself again.
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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }
@Mueni, I thanks God to hear that you are really applying some of my writings. I also became who I am by applying advice and writings form others. They say, once thinking is stretched by an idea, it never retracts. By the way, I also apply what I write and I am envious of my own growth.
@Lawrence-Thanks for your compliment. Sure sharing good information is the best way to liberate
Yes 4give 2 get 2 a new year while fresh. That has realy done good 2 ma heart.
Well said, thanks for the tips
I agree with you Lawrence, it really helps to read Joshua's notes because, personally i have come to learn n understand myself better, and happy that am growing and gaining experience by applying the steps, working on them and the will to move on!!
..,One more thing i like the way u inspire,put confidence and opening up our minds.sharing does it all.
The message brother!!!superb.
To all the readers of my notes- apologies for many spelling and grammatical errors in this note. I wrote it in a hurry and did not have time to proof read. I hope you could extract the message from the twisted English. Again, apologies.
@ Kencos, thanks.@ Steve, sure , we have more than what we need within ourselves. Capitalism has created a myth that love is giving monetary gifts.@ Ntiritu, you are right, doing this all the time will for sure make the world a better place.@Julieter, Thanks.@ Jackline- Sure@ Miriam – Sure love needs to be stretched otherwise it will shrink. Merry Xmas too.@ Mutuma- You are welcome.
Thanx bro thats a superb one.
Thanx joshua,i wish ma mum was in fcbk n read this.amezoea kunipimia hewa sana.she doesn't allow m 2visit ma frnds n ave fun.
The best xmas piece of xpression so far. Gud inspiration which teaches love n hw we can stretch it on to others. Thanx, merry xmas n hapi new year.
Tat true….we dn,t av 2 go 4 expensive gifts.thnx alt
Wow!!Thats great bro!¿ May God bless u even more to produce more of your great encrgments!!!
This is something we should practice some while,this really sets us free in body and mind,no resentments ,worry, hatred and the little stresses in life.
Thats a good advice
You are welcome Makena
…a master piece, the truly beautiful things and best ones are not in shopping malls, they are right inside us. thanks. A gud one
wow that so swit en the best way to celebrate x-mas, to share our love with our beloved ones en enemies so swit en true